I had to clean the vacuum filter today.
I don’t want to talk about it.
My last online class ended early last month, and my next class won’t start until the New Year, leaving me plenty of time to go completely nuts inside my head without a productive outlet for my mental energy. (Sorry guys, you know I love you all – even my quiet friends who may actually be reading my posts, but don’t feel like commenting – but the jury is still out as to whether my blog counts as a productive outlet without Facebook to help elicit readers and responses.)
(BTW, Mom and Auntie N, I would be lost without you two and your willingness to validate my writing by responding in the comments even though we all know that I could share my thoughts and hopes and dreams with you directly through email or text.)
(God sure knew what He was doing when He created family.)
(Especially ones that like to read.)
Anyway…I didn’t intend to have this break from school, but it’s okay because God knew what He was doing again when He carved out an eight-week chunk of time in my class schedule. Life and recent events have proven such that the risk of getting behind in a class and the possibility of not performing to the absolute best of my ability as a student might have thrown me over a figurative cliff of hopelessness and despair. This, for once, is not an exaggeration, as the few brave souls who have seen this dark place and lived to question the decision not to shove me off the cliff themselves just shouted “Amen.”
But things have slowed down a bit now, for me anyway. So now I’m going a little stir-crazy. I could use some prayer for that, especially with the kids’ Christmas break coming up. I’m excited about Christmas and all, but the kids have eight and a half days off of school. Do you have any idea how boring it is to spend eight and a half days with me? We might all go nuts if the fun parent doesn’t decide to take some time off work and rescue us.
Second, I love being a student. It can be stressful, sure, but it’s a productive stress. It’s a challenge that I can work through and usually come out successful, instead of coming out discouraged and frustrated by trying to do things that I will never be good at and/or will have to redo within the hour. School is life-giving stress. That being said, I am still itching to push through it quickly, shave off some time, and see what the Lord has in store for me in the form of a life-giving career. Lord, please forgive me for my perpetual impatience.
Anyway, I find myself tempted to add a traditional class along with my online classes to keep things moving along. This is probably completely crazy and asking for trouble, but it seems less crazy and trouble-asking than trying to double up on online classes. (Crunching a semester’s worth of learning into a six-week class…times two…have mercy!). Adding an on-campus class might be a (hopefully) manageable way to move things along and fit in another one of the three classes I need that are all offered online in the same six weeks – which also happens to be after the kids’ school will be out for summer vacation. I would be completely insane to try to double up then. Besides, I am a suh-loooooow reader, and obsessive proofreader (and I still end up with errors in my work), so I cannot – CAN. NOT. – overload myself to the point of doing work that does not meet my own standards.
The good news is Joel is on board for whatever I decide, but still, prayers for the right course of action would be appreciated, since this is going to rattle around in my brain for possibly the rest of my life if I think I’ve made the wrong decision.
So, what’s a girl to do? And don’t say scrub the microwave, ‘cause I already did that.
Oh yeah, this post is no more than a glorified request for prayer and sage advice. Did I forget to mention that before you spent the last four minutes of your life reading it? Oops. But since you did, please pipe in with…whatever in the whole wide world makes your heart happy. Just talk to me. Did I mention the part about the stir-crazy?